Good Saturday morning, gents!

Aight, we gotta talk about veggie straws, peanut M&Ms, and how they ended up saving our bedtime routine at the beach this week.

So here's the thing we keep learning over and over as parents, and I bet a lot of y'all deal with this too. When our kids act up, when they won't listen or won't settle down or won't obey the first time we ask, our first instinct is always to correct it right then and there, in the middle of whatever chaos is happening.

And that almost never works, and honestly we should've learned this by now. We just got back from our annual beach vacation and every time we head to the beach our kids get wired the second they smell the ocean air, which honestly makes sense, they're excited and that's a good thing, but combine that excitement with a new place and it has historically turned bedtime into a full-blown battle almost every single night.

And trying to correct your kid while they're already mid meltdown doesn't teach them a single thing, you're just yelling into the wind at that point. That's how you end up throwing out threats you don't actually plan on keeping, handing out consequences that don't really mean anything, and both of you as parents walking away more stressed than before, which means your kids get stuck with a version of you that isn't your best self either.

So this trip we tried something different. We had to stop for gas, grabbed some veggie straws and mixed them with peanut M&Ms, and by the time everybody had a snack in their hand and was buckled back in the car, they were calm, they were fed, and they were paying attention. So that's when we laid everything out. We told them exactly what we expected from them, exactly what would happen if they didn't listen the first time, and exactly how bedtime was gonna go once we got to the house. Then we had them say it back to us in their own words so we knew it actually stuck. Ended up being one of the best conversations we've had as a family in a long time, and bedtime that whole trip went smoother than it has in months.

So here is how we are going to raise the standard this week: Communicate ahead of time. Say it before you need it, not in the middle of the mess.

Pick one thing that keeps turning into a fight in your house, and go have that conversation before it happens again, not while it's happening.

Peace eazy,
—Collier

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