A weekly brief for men building careers and families.
Gentlemen,
Last week I said UNC losing in the first round might actually be a good thing because it would likely lead to our coach getting fired and then allow me put my energy toward the demise of the Blue Devils.
Well…in the last week, UNC fired their coach and Duke lost in EPIC fashion on a last second buzzer beater.
Simply poetic.
Let’s have a week.
-C
This Week’s Topics
Your attention is being engineered
AI can help you but it can’t lead you
Conviction means saying no (even when it costs you)
01 - The Brief 📰
What's worth your attention this week.
Social media found negligent in addiction trial. Meta and YouTube were found responsible for contributing to mental health issues in a minor due to addictive design. Why this matters: This isn’t a theory anymore. It’s confirmed. These platforms are built to keep you on them. They are not neutral. And they’re not going to change. So this becomes our responsibility. If we don’t take control of our time and attention, someone else will.
AI might agree with you even when you’re wrong. A new study showed that many AI models tend to agree with users - even when the idea is bad. Why this matters: That’s a problem. Growth doesn’t come from being agreed with. It comes from being challenged. Simple move: Next time you use AI (or talk to someone you trust) say: “Challenge my thinking.” “Where am I wrong?” Don’t just look for answers. Look for truth.
AI is a tool, not a leader. AI is fast. It’s helpful. It can make you more efficient. But it doesn’t have wisdom. It doesn’t feel tension. It doesn’t carry responsibility. It doesn’t lead a family. Why this matters: It can help you write the email. It cannot make the decision for you. Your job is still to lead.
02 - The Core 🎯
One principle to carry into the week.
THE QUOTE
“It’s a social-validation feedback loop … exactly the kind of thing that a hacker like myself would come up with, because you’re exploiting a vulnerability in human psychology.”
THE TAKE
Social media is built to pull you in (and keep you there).
Shocking, I know.
It rewards attention. Not always truth. Not always depth. Not always who you actually are.
And if you’re not careful, you start to live for that version of yourself. Or you start living through someone else who has the life you want.
That’s where drift happens. Not all at once. Little by little.
A few extra minutes. A few less real conversations. A little less presence at home.
Until one day you’re checked out.
If you don’t decide what gets your attention, someone else will.
THE MOVE
Put the phone down.
Touch some grass.
Get real feedback on real things from those you trust.
Social media, AI, the internet ain’t going nowhere.
They will take your attention. Our job is to protect it.
Build your life on purpose, not by default.
03 - The Trait 🏆
One man. One trait worth studying.
Kirk Cameron | Conviction
What did he do?
Kirk Cameron was one of the biggest teen actors in the country on Growing Pains. At the height of his career, he became a committed Christian. He started turning down roles and storylines that didn’t match his beliefs.
Over time, he stepped away from mainstream Hollywood and focused on faith-based work, media, and ministry. More recently, he created Connect - a project focused on how smartphones and social media are shaping kids, and what parents can do about it.
He recommends things like:
fostering face-to-face communication
setting strict, age-appropriate limits on device time
monitoring all accounts, and
storing devices outside of bedrooms at night to prioritize safety and healthy relationships.
(Background compiled from public sources)
What did it cost him?
A bigger Hollywood career. More fame and money. Approval from the culture around him. He chose to walk away from what was popular so he could stay true to what he believed.
What can we take from it?
Conviction costs you something. It always does.
And right now, there’s a quiet fight happening in our homes. Not loud. Not obvious.
But constant.
Our phones. Our feeds. Our attention. All pulling us away - bit by bit. If we don’t step in, no one will. We have to lead here.
Set the tone. Set the boundaries. Set the standard. Pay attention to what’s shaping us and our kids.
04 - The Pick 📚
One recommendation worth your time.
One of the best ways to stay sharp right now is simple: Put the phone down.
This book helps you do that.
We did the 28-day challenge as a family, and it was eye-opening.
Among many other things, you start to notice how often you reach for your phone without thinking.
Not because you need to. Because you’re used to it.
If you want to take back control of your time and attention, this is a great place to start.
05 - The Question ❓
One question for the week.
Where do you lose the most time on your phone?
Last week, the question was asked, “When you fail at something significant, what’s your first instinct?” Here were the results:
Reflect quietly / Assess what went wrong 🥇
Talk it through with someone I trust 🥈
Give myself time to sit in it before doing anything 🥉
Know a man who'd find this useful? Forward this to him.
Hold the line,
-Collier
